Bringing sexy back (to the election)

Sex sells.

So, it would make sense to try and make this federal election a bit sexier to boost voter turnout.

Here's some sexy-ish phrases the candidates could consider for their literature/and or websites:

> I'll stand behind you if you stand behind me.  

> I'm hoping voters give me the tools I need to go the distance.

> Why not stuff your ballot in my box?

> Hey there, what's your (lawn) sign?

> A strong election requires voters to think long and hard.

And the winner...

>  Choosing me for your riding puts you on top.

OK OK ... sorry. That's enough of that. But seriously, if you haven't voted, please do so May 2. Because democracy is sexy, baby!

Food for Thought

I've read a lot of 'top 5' or 'top 10' restaurants in Toronto guides, and a lot of them make me frown.

But what is a restaurant guide, if not just a fancy opinion column with pretty pictures of food? So I thought I would offer up my thoughts since I seem to find myself in a lot of restaurants throughout the city.

 This is not a 'top 5 cocktails' or 'top 5 pizzas' type of thing, it's just a shortlist of restaurants that have impressed me and deserve a try (in my opinion).

THE HOTHOUSE CAFE 
35 Church St. (at Front)

OK, so I've been going to the HH Cafe for about half my life, and would like to think I have earned getting good service there. But the truth is, I've always received good service there, except maybe once or twice (not bad if you consider that I've been there probably an average of 20-30 times a year over the last 16-17 years).  The flatbread pizzas are awesome, the pasta and jambalaya are great, mussels are yummy, prices are very reasonable, servers are smiley and efficient (and they know who I am!). Not to mention the patio is large and in a great location for people watching. My fave spot to eat in the city, probably always will be.


LITTLEFISH 
3080 Dundas St. W. (at Quebec Ave.)

Littefish is a charming brunch spot in the Junction. The scrambled eggs, heuvos, sausage and pancakes are to die for, the coffee is always fresh, and there are homemade cakes and treats as well. The service is very friendly and personal; the only drawback is sometimes waiting for a table, although it's well worth the wait. Oh yeah, and my partner says the bathroom is immaculate, so points for that!

SIDECAR BAR AND GRILL 
577 College St. (at Manning Ave.)

Talk about a high-class dining experience without a high-class price tag! The Sunday-through-Wednesday prix fixe menu (including appetizer, main and dessert) is easily worth the cash ($25 as of April 18, 2011), but there are lots more to feast on including ricotta gnocchi and braised oxtail. Sidecar has quite the extensive wine list. Service and atmosphere are great.

MITZI'S SISTER 
1554 Queen St. W. (at Dowling Ave.)

Mitzi's is a fun spot with a menu that covers off (weekend) brunch to dinner in fine fashion. The blackened haddock (and chili lime chicken) tacos are yummy, as are the black bean burritos and burgers. But what's best about the place is the atmosphere; it's in a great spot, the back patio is awesome, the bar selections are plentiful, the staff is friendly and chatty, and the place always seems fun (even not during the evenings when live entertainment takes over). My last visit there recently had a band featuring a bagpipe; a bit loud, but sounded great from the patio! Plus there was a guy who played there on April 15 with my last name; I should've been there to get his autograph...


MILAGRO 
5 Mercer St. (At John St.)

Milagro actually has three locations, but I'll focus on the one I've actually been to. When I first walked in (don't be afraid of the curtain!) I was greeted with warmth by the staff and handed a huge menu with a huge list of drinks. I'll just say the margaritas are worth the coin and as for the food... well, the burrito tinga was huge and stuffed full of goodness and the enchiladas were worth writing home about (or at least blogging about!)




LA REVOLUCION 
2848 Dundas St. W. (at Keele St.)

From outside it doesn't look like much, but inside is a different story.  The food is about as Mexican as I think you can get without being in Mexico (in fact, their slogan is 'the best Mexican food outside of Mexico'. Or something like that). The music varies from traditional to alternative while you munch on yummy tacos and burritos and sip a Bloody Maria or a Jarrito's Mexican soda. Vive la revolucion! (Sorry, it had to be said.)

DJERBA-LA-DOUCE 
1475 Danforth Ave. (near Coxwell Ave.)

This is the only Tunisian restaurant (that I know of) in the city of Toronto. The food takes a bit of waiting for, but it's well worth it. Try the Merguese sausage or chicken saffron with pasta. They both go well with guava juice (conveniently also on the menu). It's a small place, but there's usually an open table. The chef (and owner) is friendly and seems to genuinely appreciate his customers.

MILL ST. BREW PUB 
55 Mill St. Building 63 (in the Distillery District)

Yup, it's a pub. But it's better than your average pub. First of all, Mill Street makes awesome beer and they're all available here (with your meal or in the adjacent store). And some might not expect to get lobster at a 'pub', but the lobster grilled cheese on the menu is surprisingly good. The burgers are pretty darn good too. You can even earn your MBA here (Master of Beer Appreciation), a stamp card that carries rewards. Oh, and the patio offers a view of the distillery district... need I say more?

UDUPI PALACE 
1460 Gerrard St. E. (at Craven Rd.)

This place is awesome. You can eat South Indian cuisine until you almost explode for a relatively little amount of cash, and every dish that I've tried (all the dishes here are vegetarian) tastes great. The deep fried onion pakoras are a great way to start.

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What do you think, people? I'd love to hear your picks.

Who should decide if Graffiti is Art?

The age-old debate: is graffiti art?


And who is to decide this, Mayor Rob Ford and the rest of council?


Mayor Ford was in Toronto's Davenport area April 7 and he personally powerwashed some spraypaint from walls as part of the Clean Toronto Together campaign. 


 While many graffiti tags are admittedly unsightly (in my opinion), there is also some beautiful work in that area and other parts of the city. Will they also meet their fate?


Here's an idea: perhaps a committee, made up of artists, residents and municipal officials (gotta even the keel), should do a 'juried show' of Toronto's graffiti. There could be several committees – maybe one in each ward – which would catalogue the graffiti and decide whether it should stay. 


Graffiti deemed 'good enough' (i.e. looking like someone put some time and effort into it) and not on private property (against the owner's will) would gain immunity from the city's cleanup campaign. The 'saved' graffiti could also become part of an art tour of some kind. 


This could be a nice compromise for those who want the graffiti eradicated and those who appreciate it as art. 


Just an idea...

A Royal waste of Money?

While my wife-to-be and I gasp over quotes to cater and photograph our wedding, in England the Royal couple could rack up a bill of fifty million pounds (about CDN $78 million).

On top of that, the big wedding could cost Britain’s economy six billion pounds because the spectacle has actually been declared a bank holiday, sandwiched in a bunch of other holidays.

OK, I know this is Prince William we're talking about here – an heir to the throne – but I can't imagine the pressure of such an event. Everyone who is anyone (with the exception of the Canadian Prime Minister, it seems) will be in attendance – 1,900 people in total, not to mention millions of TV viewers.

I personally believe a wedding should be a private affair for family and close friends. Not a grand 'look-at-me' gesture.

We are looking at around 100 guests, which I consider a big crowd. And so far, our wedding hasn't been picked up by any TV networks.

It seems like a colossal waste of cash to me to spend fifty million pounds on a one-day party. Maybe I'm too social-minded; I would rather help others with that money. Which is probably why I'll never be rich (sorry, honey).

But to be fair to Prince William and Kate Middleton, they probably don't have much say in the matter. The royalty before them are surely calling the shots on this one.

I have nothing against the Royal Family, but I do have something against lavish spending that will benefit only those involved.

Wondering the Universe (PT. 1)

I have an interest in history.  But not just your usual interest in say, the world wars, pioneers, or pirates (although pirates are super sweet. Second only to ninjas). 


My curiosity goes a bit further than that. Let me explain. 


We tend to take human behaviour for granted – we laugh, we kiss, we fart, we drink, we joke, we eat prepared food... yes, you get the idea.


How did this all come to be?


Did you ever stop to think who the first person to tell a joke was, and what that joke may have been? 


Back to the dawn of man: While out hunting for food, one Neanderthal turns to the other and says, "ugghh.... so... ugghhhhh.... what call dinner?" 


Other neanderthal looks puzzled. "ArrrrGGGHH... what?" 


First neanderthal says... "Dead meat!" (Translated of course from some ancient dialect.)


(Pause) then a short grunt that could pass for a laugh from Nean#2. 


OK, so it's a bad joke. But remember, that was supposed to be the first joke ever. Of course it's going to suck. I mean, it probably wasn't a knock-knock joke. 


But if it was... 


"Knock knock!" 


Neanderthal asks, "Who there?"


Voice from behind cave door: "Sab!"


Nean: "Sab who?"


"SABRE TOOTH TIGER!"


Along those same lines, can you explain why farting is funny? OK, it's just a basic bodily function. But who was the first to laugh about it? 


Just think, before farting was funny, early man could just fart and keep on 'talking' like nothing happened. But now it's in our instincts to react to flatulence with snickering. Next time you're talking to a friend and let out a long fart, try not to crack a smile while continuing to talk. (Good luck.)


And what about kissing... is that instinct or did an accidental smashing of lips lead to the modern day version? I mean, think back to your first kiss. Was it awkward? Probably. Now think back to the FIRST KISS EVER and the thoughts that would be going through their heads:  


"WHAT ARE WE DOING? WHAT ARE WE DOING? WHAT… ohhhh, that's nice." (Translated of course from some ancient dialect.)


And what about alcohol? I mean, historians claim fermentation is as old at 10,000 BC. But was it an accident that led to the discovery that rotting material can get you drunk? And who was the first person to get hammered and subsequently hungover, and how did he/she relay this experience to their peers?


"Man, I was so hungry last night I ate some rice sitting in a bowl... but it was a bit mushy... and I drank the stuff at the bottom. Next thing I know, all the women servants looked better than ever and then I blacked out. But they said I danced like never before." (Translated of course from some ancient dialect.)


So just let your mind wander (wonder?). Think about the first person ever to do any given thing in your daily life, and what they must've thought at the time. 


Those folks didn't have any kids in the schoolyard to tell them how it is. They were the ones who told the others who eventually down the line told the first kid in the first schoolyard about it, who then passed it down through generations. 


Kinda blows your mind. 


Feel free to add more thoughts and theories to this. I mean, maybe we'll uncover another first in the process. 


Oops, just farted. 
Ha. 

The Wedding Files: Part I

Sometimes, you surprise even yourself.

That's exactly what happened to me when I proposed to my girlfriend of two years – on Valentine's Day of all days... cheesy, right?

But it was the perfect day to do it. My girlfriend (love you Gooberstix!) didn't suspect I would pull this stunt, especially on a day when guys are supposed to do something nice for women.

I put the ring in a bigger box (how clever am I) and when she saw the ring box, she was so excited she slipped the ring on her own finger. I didn't really even have to ask for a 'yes'.

So now that the nerve-wracking proposal is out of the way (I almost couldn't feel my legs after), now comes the real challenge, one that I didn't really expect; well, sort of, but not fully –

Planning. 

What colour should the flowers be? Will shoes match those flowers? Pink or white gold in the wedding band? What theme for a cake? Open bar or drink tickets? Should there be bagpipes? What songs should be on the playlist? Should I shave?

That's just the tip of the iceberg.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I'm just a tiny bit overwhelmed. That being said, I'm keeping the planning duties at arm's length, as my wife-to-be has surrounded herself with wedding magazines to help guide her through the process. And she really seems to enjoy it all.

So do I to a certain point, but if my brain spends more than an hour or two thinking about a wedding each day, it will short out and explode.

But with all the planning so far, there's also been a genuine outpouring of love and encouragement from our friends and family. We've already been treated to an engagement party complete with Rock Band, with another party coming up and who knows what in between.

From a partying/hanging with friends and family standpoint, getting married is awesome. 

It's also awesome when your partner is awesome.

So if the flowers are yellow or blue, if the music is jazz or rock, if we serve sausage rolls or cheese sticks, in the end it doesn't really matter to me.

All I want is for my beautiful bride-to-be to say 'I do'. (Awwww. Hope I didn't spoil anyone's lunch.)

Stay tuned as we navigate our way along the curvy road to wedded bliss. 

There's a little bit of Sheen in all of us...

If I could have your attention for just Two and a Half seconds:

A lot has been floated in the media recently regarding embattled Hollywood (hero? Anti-hero?) Charlie Sheen.

I'm not above writing about his activities of late either.

But is any of it actually newsworthy? Well, this is one of those times when the public makes that call. 

Truth is, the average person has an insatiable appetite when it comes to the perceived falls-from-grace of Hollywood Stars (note: I just Googled 'fall from grace' and the first hit was a Sheen story). That's what has kept tabloids at grocery checkouts for so many years.

You may not ever pick up or buy those gossip rags (or read quickly-pieced together celebrity dirt stories like mine on the web), but don't pretend you're not interested in Sheen's antics. Even those people who are criticizing Sheen, or making comments like "I couldn't care less about him"– well, they have just expressed an interest in some form or another.

Truth is, Sheen represents the human condition; we can all see some aspects of ourselves in him. His free-loving ways, drinking, drugging, lashing out, and wild partying are all things we've imagined we'd like to take part in at some point (as if we haven't already).

It's the same principle that makes people see movies like The Hangover and call it "awesome". They put themselves in the character's shoes, and think, "Wow, wouldn't it be great to let go – I mean, really let go – for just one night?"

As it turns out, Sheen seems to have 'let it go' many nights.

That being said, like many, many others I'm a fan of his sitcom (which is currently on hold), Two and a Half Men, which seems to mirror his life. 

Why do I like the show? Because his character lives his life the way he chooses to live it. He is witty. He is funny. He is 'winning'.

But there is another side to this man that some of the more 'responsible' folks can relate to. After he joined Twitter recently and posted a picture of himself alongside one of his 'goddesses' (as he calls them), he also updated his million-plus followers about the status of his twin boys, who were taken from him by police after his ex-wife claimed foul.

After thanking all the Twitter users who followed him and wished him well – "In all sincerity... Thank you Twitter community for the warm reception" – he posted, "Pardon my absence.... My first concern is my kids... Back soon..!"

He has also reportedly backed off on demands for a pay increase for appearances on the sitcom, while advocating for the show's crew to get its payout for cancelled episodes. 

Does that sound like a man who has completely forgotten all responsibility and courtesy? Is he an antisocial monster like some media outlets seem to paint him as?

I don't think so. 

As my wonderful wife-to-be (love you Gooberstix!) said about the male fascination with Sheen – "I think men who are generally decent have a hard time looking away from stuff like this, like Charlie is showing you the 'other' way of being a successful guy."

That sums it up better than I ever could. 

Thanks for reading. Now back to real news – for example – radical change in the Middle East.